Posted by: effingwishes | August 7, 2010

Smiles

More often than I like to admit, I feel like days go by without smiling. Not the business smile, the gracious or polite smile or even the Wow you just saved my ass smile. But a smile that you feel in your soul.
Last week I smiled. A lot. Smiled at the sand. Smiled at strangers. Smiled as I ate the best pie ever.
Then it was back home and back to reality. Back to work. Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind my work. But what we do isn’t important. Sure in your wallet right now is a piece of plastic that a coworker or I had some hand in getting your way. And sure that’s important to you. That card was used to buy morning coffee or fill up the family car with gas. But when it comes down to it – is it important? No. If you need something and your card isn’t working you can shlep your way to the bank. I recognize that most people don’t feel like their job is important but we all have some job to do.
Ok not sure where that tangent was leading so nipping it in the butt and trying to remember where I was headed before these Mosquitos eat me alive.
Oh yes … Smiling.
Take a deep breath. Yes now go ahead. Let it out slowly and smile. For a split second before thoughts enter your head again, didn’t it feel Good?! Like chocolate cake Good?! I thought so!!
So here’s my dilemma… How do you keep and retain that feeling? Is it all of the think positive/ be positive? Smile on the outside even if you are the sad clown with a Fake it Til You make it attitude?
Around 450 this afternoon, after a long and annoying week, I received a random text. Several exchanges later I felt myself light and happy. My face felt wonky. What is happening to my face? A smile? Am I smiling? Is it gas? No it was a brief reminder that someone was thinking of me. And that warmed my soul.
Then I got home. I try to keep the smile and the happiness, positive thought and all of that mumbojumbo. The smile isn’t there. The warmness is my face was back, but I think the 2 large glasses of wine had more to do with that than any surrounding.
Tomorrow I will get to spin. It’s been almost 2 weeks. I feel so Mmmmmmooooooooooo is really the only adjective I have. I’m looking forward to the adrenaline rush and the smile that will follow.
The mosquito looking at me now as I sit on the porch on this perfect summer night has a huge smile on his face because I am sure he thinks that him and his family will suck me dry. He might be right so I better stop and go inside. And dream of days filled with smiles.

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